I showed him my bush... on skype.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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