clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
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She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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