The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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