I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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