Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
