Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
