Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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