I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize
