"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
