So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
