All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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