i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
someone get that fucking seahorse.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
