wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Randomize
