Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize
