im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
We need to get me chipped asap
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
