hotel room ftw
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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