we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
