he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
i would one night stand the shit outta him
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
