I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
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