My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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