I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
