He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
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