mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
