Sry I called you an 8
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
