I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
