I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
bring money and cleavage
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
