Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
