Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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