I murdered the dance floor call the cops
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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