Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
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There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize