I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
