I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
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