Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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