Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
