He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
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He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
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just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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