You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize