In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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