cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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