Non-Jews are for practice
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize