toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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