Just mADE A PArabola og urine
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
