I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Sorry my hands just texted you
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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