so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize