I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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