You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
