You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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