I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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