Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
