I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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