i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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