you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize