Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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